Daddy

Please see update at bottom of post after you read this. 

All my hugs and all my kisses

all my dreams and all my wishes

they are for you

they are for you.

All the love that's in my heart

I want to bring to where you are.

I love you Daddy!

I crawled up into Daddy's lap and threw my arms around his neck and hugged Him with everything I had and kissed His face.  I could see Him look at me with the warmest smile and sensed He was pleased with me and what I've been doing. "You're doing such a good job, you're not falling short, although I know you feel that way at times but that's because you don't know your heart the way I do.  I see all of your heart therefore My judgment is true, righteous and holy.  You are doing great and one day you will see all the plans, all the dreams I have for you come to pass, but in the meantime you must trust Me.  You must trust My heart, you must trust My love, you must trust My mercy, you must trust My grace. 

I could feel Him hugging me, pulling me into Himself as He did, then letting me go just like a little girl to run and play and I could feel how much it touched His heart for me to hug Him and kiss Him.  That's when I wrote the song above. 

I live for these times with Him.  Days that I don't see or can't see for whatever reason are many at times.  I am not sure why that is, just that it is.  But His presence is what keeps me alive, keeps me pressing forward.  I begin to weep ....."My child don't cry, let Me wipe the tears from your eyes.  For one day you will see all that was meant to be will be just as I planned though at times it seems all you can see is the enemies hand.  But know even when you can't see Me or hear Me or feel Me I am there with you.  You are never out of My sight,  you are always on My mind.  I have such wonderful things in store for you......

Update:   At the time of this writing I had no idea that just two months following this I would be faced with stage 2 breast cancer. I also had no idea of just how precious this particular time with Him would come to be to me nor the strength I would draw from it. But He did. I remember kind of wondering what was coming as I thought about what He had said to me that day, specifically the part about trusting Him.  I could just feel He was preparing me. Turns out I was right.

I had initially been diagnosed with breast cancer in December of 2009 following a routine mammogram, however, at the time I didn't have health insurance nor the financial resources to do anything except pray.   For the following six months I fought to overcome a spirit of fear that was relentless in trying to make me come into agreement with the enemies plans to end my life as images of leaving my two girls by death were paraded through my mind night after night.  Six months following I had a visitation from the Lord and at that time He told me He would heal me when I least expected it. I would not let go of my promise.  Like most of us do I had my idea of how this healing would happen and every morning upon waking I would always check to see if the mass which at the time was the size of a lima bean was gone only to find it still there.  Despite the ongoing existence of it I had peace beyond understanding and never doubted I would live and not die. In June of 2013 the Lord led me to go to work for Michael's. and was provided health insurance that I would need a year and a half later as by this time following another mammogram it had become clear to me that my healing would come through way of surgery.  In January of 2014 I had surgery to remove the mass that was now the size of a golf ball.  I was pronounced cancer free two months later without the need of chemo or radiation. Even the oncologist assigned to me was amazed that I had lived for five years without it spreading.  All the cancer was contained in my breast and removed. Not even one lymph node was affected. I am without a doubt a walking miracle.  

Immanuel, God With Us

    While driving and listening to a Christmas song I was overwhelmed by the presence of the Lord and the reality of what Christmas is really all about. Immanuel, God with us…..this is the true meaning of Christmas and what has given me more joy this year than ever before.

     God so loved the world that He gave his one and only Son that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life. John 3:16.  I know we have heard it a jillion times and maybe that’s the reason the truth of it doesn’t really sink in like it should.  He likes, no loves our presence. It’s hard to imagine sometimes I know, but that is the truth. He did what had to be done to satisfy the demands of His justice in order to ‘be with us’. I thought about what Jesus said on the cross, “It is finished”! I know that’s another holiday, but I cried as I wondered why we keep trying to add to that. God wants our fellowship and Jesus made that possible. We make that impossible when we keep adding to what God has already done. We have all sinned and fallen short of His glory and are justified freely by His grace.

     I read a scripture in Acts and the part of judging yourself unworthy really spoke to me.

Acts 14:46-47 Certain Jews in Antioch were opposing the gospel the Apostle Paul was preaching and in response Paul’s words were,”It was necessary that the word of God should be spoken to you first; but since you reject it, and judge yourselves unworthy of eternal life, behold we turn to the Gentiles.

     We will undoubtedly judge ourselves unworthy anytime we add to what God has already done in sending His son Jesus into the world to be our Savior. God wants your fellowship; don’t deny Him by believing the lie that Jesus isn’t enough. Maybe you don’t think you judge yourself unworthy of eternal life, but enjoying God’s presence is part of eternal life now, not just after we die.

John 17:3 Jesus said,” Now this is eternal life: that they know you the only true God and Jesus Christ whom you have sent.” To know is to recognize, perceive, feel, even see and be aware of.   

Christmas can be a very difficult time for a lot of people and I have been one of them, but no matter what physical circumstances we may be experiencing, nothing can alter the eternal truth that Jesus is the greatest gift we can ever receive, for God demonstrated His love for us and His desire to be with us even now, today.

In His Presence Is Fullness of Joy

     Authentic, genuine encounters with the Presence of Jesus are being sacrificed on the altars of convenience and comfort and “proper religious protocol” and the body of Christ is dying because of it. People must encounter in a real tangible way the presence and power of God, no matter what the cost, be it reputation or credibility among the religious politically correct, whatever.  While programs and agenda’s have a place, could it be that they are taking the place that belongs to the Lord?

     This particular subject is near and dear to me is because I know the kind of relationship just attending church because it is Sunday and this is what we do kind of thing creates. I know because it used to be me and it wasn’t until I was in an environment where the freedom of the Holy Spirit was fostered and embraced rather than avoided that I was really healed emotionally (if you read my testimony you will understand better what I mean).  I came out of a relationship that was made up of rules taught by men rather than passion for the King who died for me. There is an atmosphere created in a corporate environment that brings about the movement of the Holy Spirit that is different than when we are alone.  It is this type of atmosphere that brings people to a place of vulnerability and transparency before God that allows for deep emotional healing. We are seeing people in unprecedented numbers who are not attending church and to be honest I don't wonder why.

    There are things coming and some that are even now upon us, a prophesied order of events lining up the return of Christ which make intimacy with the Lord an absolute necessity; church as usual will not suffice the body of Christ in the days ahead. Some of what is coming we won't like that is just as much in the plan, purpose and will of God as all that we do like and want to embrace.  

Isaiah 60:1-3 Arise, shine; For your light has come! And the glory of the Lord is risen upon you. For behold, darkness shall cover the earth, and deep darkness the people; But the Lord will arise over you, and His glory will be seen upon you.  The Gentiles shall come to your light, And kings to the brightness of your rising.

I don't believe our job is to stop His process, purpose, or plans, but to be what He has created us to be in the midst of that. He wants our cooperation in the advancement of His kingdom, not to be like the Pharisees of old who were unwilling to embrace the new day.

God doesn't want for us to just “survive” the flood but to walk on the water.  To stand erect as oaks of righteousness in the midst of the storm; to be the light in the midst of darkness.  He desires for us to bring Him glory in the midst of what is coming, not pray against it, or simply hope to survive it but to be His witnesses in it, however, He doesn’t expect us to do it on our own.

     God’s heart is for us to be a people prepared for the Lord. There is a wave of His glory coming such as never has been seen before. He wants us prepared in order to properly steward what is coming. Our greatest days as the body of Christ are on their way!

His Authority

I know along with countless other dear brothers and sisters in Christ, my husband and I have been traversing through some very rough terrain, not just in one area of our life but in all areas of our life for the past several years.  Contrary to what the enemy would have us believe, it is because we heeded the voice of the Lord and followed Him.  I am so, so grateful that despite all the interference the enemy has used to keep me from hearing the Lord in the midst of a dark time, I know in my heart I have discerned not only His voice, but His way as well.  I also know that the ability to do that has come because I set my face to seek the Lord in the time of prosperity which is what we are instructed to do in His word.

Psalm 32:6 Therefore let everyone who is godly pray to you while you may be found; surely when the mighty waters rise, they will not reach him.

Isaiah 55:6 Seek the Lord while he may be found, call upon him while he is near.

One of the things the Lord has made very clear to me during this time is that He is preparing a people who He can trust with His authority. The measure of His authority we exercise upon this earth in order to advance His kingdom will be in proportion to the measure of His authority we are submitted to.  The more we know His love, the more willing we are to submit. Selah. 

When we get saved we are immediately delivered from the power of sin, from its influence/authority over us, legally speaking, but the outward manifestation of that occurs over a process of time as we do what is necessary to strengthen our spirit man so that our soul comes into greater and greater submission rather than being in control.

In the same way, coming to operate in the authority of the Kingdom is something that is incremental over time. As children we have the possibility and probability of one day driving a car, but we aren’t handed the car keys until we have proven we know how to operate a motor vehicle. In the same way the scripture says, ‘to those who believe on His name He gives the right to become the children of God’, but we are also told in Galatians, ’that a son differs not from a slave although he owns the whole estate but is under guardians and stewards until the time appointed by the father’.  I believe the church as a whole has been in a concentrated season of being proved by the Lord to see who will come to a place of a mature son of the kingdom and who will continue to wander in the wilderness pining for the fulfilling of their fleshly appetites.

Just as I have heard it said, this isn’t your grandfathers America, well, this isn’t your grandfather’s religion either. God’s eyes have been roaming to and fro throughout the earth to show Himself strong on behalf of those whose hearts are fully committed to Him.

There is a scripture in Isaiah which I believe the Lord is using to define the generation of believers that are emerging in the last days (which I believe we are in) that reads:

Arise shine for your light has come

And the glory of the Lord is risen upon you.

For behold darkness shall cover the earth

 and deep darkness the people

But the Lord will arise over you,

And His glory will be seen upon you. 

The Gentiles shall come to your light,

and kings to the brightness of your rising.

Isaiah 60:1-3

I believe that the measure of His glory that will be seen upon us will be in proportion to the measure of His authority we walk in, but that stems from the measure of our submission to His authority which comes from the revelation of His love. I’m afraid in coming days we are going to see an even greater number of ministers lose their ministry because they have not excercised His authority over their own life first to drive out the giants of greed and self indulgence but have used it to advance their kingdom rather than His. God is raising up  and a new company of believers who have sought the Lord not for His power and authority (His hand) but His face, His heart, for His Presence alone.  As a result, they will be rooted and grounded in love and will comprehend what is the width, length, depth and height of His love and be filled with the fullness of God. Remember, faith works by love.